Was God ever stuck in an endless cycle?
And how did it make Him feel?
Did He ever feel “unproductive” or “unsuccessful”?
I imagine not.
But surely He had every excuse to feel that way….
40 years in the desert, round and round and round,
Complaints and disobedience and discipline and doubt –
When it should have been the happy journey of a few days,
Filled with faith and trust and much rejoicing.
God could have felt trapped. Used. Abused. Unsuccessful.
But He stayed with them. Trained them. Taught them. Disciplined them.
He was patient. Holy. Forgiving. Jealous. Committed. Powerful.
They refused to see. Refused to trust. Refused to rejoice. Complained against their Maker.
And God gave them what they wanted. But it wasn’t. Not really.
When His children begged for a king because their heart-eyes couldn’t see –
Did God feel rejected? Replaced? Hurt? Angry? Useless? Still He remained. Still He spoke. Still He trained and disciplined and loved and chided.
He gave them what they wanted.
But they didn’t. Not truly.
When over hundreds of years God could not find a man who could see or who would speak His words –
Did He grow weary in the waiting? Did He doubt the future? Or fear the outcome?
Did He grow angry, bitter, resentful?
We know He didn’t. Couldn’t. But could we have blamed Him if He had?
When each child, it seemed, set their eyes on the earth, knelt their knees to that which rots, opened their mouths and mocked their Creator –
He gave them the fruit of their lips.
But did they know what seed their lips had planted? He gave them what they wanted – even though they didn’t.
When He gifted His Son and they closed their eyes; when He sent His Word and they stopped their ears;
When He offered them Love and they wished Him to die –
Did God feel discouraged? Did He feel unsuccessful? Did He ever regret? Or want to pull back and begin a new plan? We know that He didn’t – but would we have?
He gave them what they wanted – though they were clueless. He gave them what they needed – even though they didn’t know.
How faithful is our God? How all-knowing, patient, gentle, and kind He is…He knows what we need. He KNOWS. But He often gives us what we want when we refuse to listen. And oftentimes, when we get what we so desperately wanted, we realize that it wasn’t what we truly wanted at all.
If you, like me, are feeling some of these things – unsuccessful, frustrated, trapped, used, replaced – whatever season you are walking through right now, remember that God walked through it first. Whatever it is that you are desperately wanting – remember that He knows what you need. Choose to walk this season in faith, in trust, and with rejoicing – knowing that you have a Maker Who sees you – and Who knows.
Photo by Ivars Krutainis on Unsplash
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